My good buddy and fellow Boxer-block fan Kentrik directed me to something far better than any cat with a cheeseburger. He actually found a site with the answer to all of the deep philosophical questions of life.
Why do you not have a girlfriend?
Why do your neighbors hate you?
Why do you still live at home with your mother?
Why don't I like the French?
Why? Because racecar!
And my personal favorite...
It's almost as awesome as 42.